Frankly Freddie True Tails – Santa’s Plight

Dear human-beings,

Besides being soft and cuddly a mission of mine is to bring poetry to the masses, of which you are some.   And I am here to bring you the truth . . . even though it might hurt.

Santa was frantic at the North Pole

Finances in the red, he was in the hole

Mrs Claus couldn’t afford sugar

For her cookies sublime

Dear old hubby didn’t have a dime


North Pole employment had exploded

and Santa’s credit was eroded

He’d spent his last cent on black Friday deals

and turkey with the trimmings for thanksgiving meals


The night before Christmas he no longer had clout

When all the elves threatened a walk-out

Elf-union held all the chips

As evidenced by the grin on all the elf lips

For every elf in all the land

had won a pay deal without tipping their hand:

Double pay all December

a free thanksgiving meal in November

Finally fringe benefits for elves was real

For Santa and the Mrs, there was no appeal

Santa had bitten his nails to the quick

Both right and left eyes developed a tic

All Santa could do was self medicate

So he stuffed his mouth from the cookie plate santa-claus-being-drunk-holding-beer-33377069

And downed all the rum from a hot toddy cup

his blood pressure sky-high, went up and up

His big fat belly shook like a bowl full of lead

While visions of bankruptcy danced in his head

So all you children and adults too

Have compassion and learn to make due  

STOP asking for presents and things you don’t need

YOU must now take heed.

It’s no time for greed

If you want Santa another Christmas to live

to every red-kettle-bell-ringer

Dig in your pocket and GIVE.

Poetically yours,

Freddie Parker Westerfield


8 comments on “Frankly Freddie True Tails – Santa’s Plight

    • Dear Sharon Bonin-Pratt – human-being,
      Please don’t forget that dog cookies are an exception as they are essential to canine well-being . . .not to mention incentive.

      Freddie Parker Westerfield, CC
      Cookie Connoisseur


    • Dear Delphini Iverson Miriam Human-being,
      You are obviously a human with refined literary taste. Humans only think they need all sorts of useless stuff. I try to be a role model for humans.

      Freddie Parker Westerfield, C.R.M.
      Canine Role Model


  1. Freddie, my dear, I never knew you are so talented with poetry. As I read your poem I feel so bad for Santa. I will surely dig deep and donate. Keep it up with your poetry.


    • Dear Linda T., Human-being,
      You, obviously, are a sensitive, caring human-being with an ability to empathize with Santa’s plight. Additionally, you have the same refined literary taste as Delphini Iverson Miriam Human-being.

      Freddie Parker Westerfield, T.C.P.
      Talented Canine Poet


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